Lately, I've been into writing letters to myself. It's like my map to peace. I mean, when I write a letter to myself to preserve a memory of something hilarious that Kennedy said, I stay with the humor a little bit longer. And when I write a letter to myself to exhale tension, it offers me a place to get along with the not so friendly feelings. For me, it's quite therapeutic. I thought I'd share today's letter with you. After all, it's about inclusivity. :)
Hello Adrianne. Hello You.
I see you feeling rejected. I see you wondering what exactly happened that someone you thought of as a friend isn't responding to your communication anymore. I see you wanting to pout and cry because it hurts to feel rejected. I see you wanting to call someone you trust and say negative things so that you feel better. I see you wanting to call a different friend so that she will tell you how loved and valued you are, hoping that will make you feel better too.
Hello feeling of rejection.
I see you here. Did you come alone or are you acting as a guard? Ah, I see you standing taller and bigger, in front of vulnerability. You can stay if you want, but you don't need to guard anymore.
I see you. I see you timid and barely able to show up. It's ok. You are welcome here, too. We will all be here together for a moment. Do you want to sit with me on the porch and feel nourished in the gentle sunshine? Do you want to listen to this song with me and soothe your heart ache with the buoyancy of the music? You are important too, and I'll hold you tenderly.
We are all here together. Hello peacefulness. Thank you for joining us. We are so happy to see you.
And now I don't feel the need to talk negatively on the phone about someone I once knew, and I don't need to hear from another friend that she loves me. In this letter to myself, in my beloved journal, I travel the layers of my feelings looking for what feels soothing.